This happened back on Sunday, April 6. That morning, like we do most Sunday mornings, we took the dog out for a walk for a couple of hours. On our way back to the house, █████ developed a hankering for a donut. We stopped by a couple of neighborhood bakeries that were on our way but none had donuts, and no other type of pastry would do.
A few blocks from home, I pointed across the street. "How about we stop over there at Dunkin."
"No," she said resignedly, "I don't want a donut from Dunkin."
That evening we went into Manhattan to see Lady Gaga's next-to-last concert on the next-to-last night of Roseland Ballroom's existence. I didn't consider myself a Lady Gaga fan, but the spectacle was pretty great.
As we were walking back to the subway after the show, I spotted a Dunkin Donuts not far from the Ed Sullivan Theater.
"I want a cup of coffee," I said.
"It's too late for caffeine," █████ said.
"That's what you said last night after Divergent. But tonight I took you to see Lady Gaga on the VIP mezzanine. I think that means I get coffee."
She conceded the point and we went inside. The place was empty but for two smiling men behind the counter. I ordered a coffee. The conversation proceeded like this:
Dunkin Donuts Guy #1: How do you like your coffee?
Bill: Milk, no sugar.
Dunkin Donuts Guy #2: How is it out?
█████: It's nice out.
Bill: We're very happy. We just saw Lady Gaga.
Dunkin Donuts Guy #2: Really? [to DDG1] Give them free donuts.
And we walked out of Dunkin Donuts agog, with two free donuts in a paper bag. By which I can only conclude that Lady Gaga is magic.
Author
Hugo and Nebula Award nominee. Creator of Proper Manuscript Format, Spelling Bee Solver, Tylogram, and more. Banned in Canada.
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