What? Surely the angelic young missionary pictured below could never have been capable of the act described in the 30-year-old newspaper clipping to the right. Right?
Sorry, but we're afraid he was. You can read all about it in my acclaimed memoir The Accidental Terrorist: Confessions of a Reluctant Missionary. For a limited time, you can get a personalized, signed edition for only $19.95 in hardcover or $11.95 in trade paperback,—with free shipping in the United States! Or get the ebook edition for just $2.99.
Trust me. That kid below? He's a bad, bad hombre. It's sad, really.

Author
Hugo and Nebula Award nominee. Creator of Proper Manuscript Format, Spelling Bee Solver, Tylogram, and more. Banned in Canada.
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